Scouting: Skit Files p8
Description
This article is from the Scouting FAQ, by Bill Nelson nelsonb@nospam.aztec.asu.edu, Soaring Golden Eagle eagle@rangernet.org and Alan Houser troop24@emf.net with numerous contributions by others.
Scouting: Skit Files p8
New Saw
Announcer: This scene takes place in a hardware store in a small
north woods lumber town.
Lumberjack: (Enters) My old crosscut saw is worn out, and I need
something that will let me cut more wood, or I'm
going to go broke !
Owner : Yes, sir ! For only one hundred bucks you can be the
proud owner of this chain saw. I guarantee that it
will cut twice as much wood in a day as your own
crosscut.
Lumberjack: (Handing over money) O.K. great ! (Exits)
Announcer: The next day.
Lumberjack: (Enters tiredly) There's something wrong with this
saw. I worked very hard yesterday, and only cut half
as much wood.
Owner : Well, sir, I have a lot of faith in this product.
Here, I'll put a new chain on it and you give it
another try.
Lumberjack: O.K., but if it doesn't do any better, I'll be back !
(Exits)
Announcer: The next day.
Lumberjack: (Enters exhausted) This darned saw is no good. I
worked even harder, and still it won't cut half the
wood of my old saw ! I want my money back !
Owner : Yes, sir ! Just let me check it out here. (Pulls
starter rope
Announcer: (Makes sound effects of saw running.)
Lumberjack: Oh, my gosh ! What on earth is all that noise ?
Puppy in the Box
Props: A cardboard box, and a stuffed dog (or rabbit, etc.)
Announcer: This scene takes place on the street outside a
grocery store.
(Several participants are gathered around outside the store,
chatting.)
Roger : (Enters holding the box) Hi guys, would you please hold
this box for me while I go into the store ? (Exits)
Martin: I wonder what's in the box ?
Gerry : I don't know, but something is leaking out !
Bob : (Rubs finger against the bottom of box, then licks
finger) Hmmm, it tastes like lemon soda.
Martin: (Also rubs box and tastes finger) No. I think it's more
like chicken soup.
Roger : (Returns, looks in box) Oh, you naughty puppy !
Fly in the Soup
Customer: Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup !
Waiter : (Enters, very snooty, peering into the soup) Oh, yes,
you are right sir. That will be an extra 25 cents for
the meat.
Customer: But waiter, he's swimming all over the top !
Waiter : (Still snooty) You are right, sir. It doesn't know
it's a fly, sir. It's doing the Butterfly stroke.
Customer: Well, I think it must be an Australian !
Waiter : Why do you say that sir ?
Customer: BECAUSE IT'S DOWN UNDER NOW !
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