7. So what can I do about it?
Description
This article is from the Suicide FAQ, by Graham Stoney greyham@research.canon.com.au with numerous contributions by others.
7. So what can I do about it?
There usually are people to whom a suicidal person can turn for help;
if you ever know someone is feeling suicidal, or feel suicidal
yourself, seek out people who could help, and keep seeking until you
find someone who will listen. Once again, the only way to know if
someone is feeling suicidal is if you ask them and they tell you.
Suicidal people, like all of us, need love, understanding and care.
People usually don't ask "are you feeling so bad that you're thinking
about suicide?" directly. Locking themselves away increases the
isolation they feel and the likelihood that they may attempt suicide.
Asking if they are feeling suicidal has the effect of giving them
permission to feel the way they do, which reduces their isolation; if
they are feeling suicidal, they may see that someone else is beginning
to understand how they feel.
If someone you know tells you that they feel suicidal, above all,
listen to them. Then listen some more. Tell them "I don't want you
to die". Try to make yourself available to hear about how they feel,
and try to form a "no-suicide contract": ask them to promise you that
they won't suicide, and that if they feel that they want to hurt
themselves again, they won't do anything until they can contact either
you, or someone else that can support them. Take them seriously, and
refer them to someone equipped to help them most effectively, such as
a Doctor, Community Health Centre, Counsellor, Psychologist, Social
Worker, Youth Worker, Minister, etc etc. If they appear acutely
suicidal and won't talk, you may need to get them to a hospital
emergency department.
Don't try to "rescue" them or to take their responsibilities on board
yourself, or be a hero and try to handle the situation on your own.
You can be the most help by referring them to someone equipped to
offer them the help they need, while you continue to support them and
remember that what happens is ultimately their responsibility. Get
yourself some support too, as you try to get support for them; don't
try to save the world on your own shoulders.
If you don't know where to turn, chances are there are a number of 24
Hour anonymous telephone counselling or suicide prevention services in
your area that you can call, listed in your local telephone directory.
The crisis resource posting mentioned at the top of this posting also
lists a number of Internet resources which provide support for people
in crisis.
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